Boundaries

We are supposed to have them but do we?

Have you ever had a relationship, either personal, working or friendship that frustrated you?

Most of the time this frustration comes from your boundaries being impinged upon.

Rewind. What?

Let's say you hire a contractor to build a new privacy fence in your yard. But you don’t tell him the extents of your property. So he starts work and builds you a great privacy fence. Then you come home and it its 20 feet from the edge of where you wanted it. You would be pretty frustrated right?

I know I would be.

Why?

Because boundaries are important. They communicate the extents of what needs to be done. One of the sources of conflict in our lives is unmet expectations. We inadvertently expect someone to do something because we think that they should do this or that. However if we have not specifically asked that person, or informed them of our needs how can we expect them to know what we want?

What?

Have you ever tried parking in a lot that doesn’t have lines painted on it yet? In the beginning parking would be fairly orderly but after awhile it would become pretty chaotic. That is what happens when we don’t have clear boundaries in our lives.

It really stinks when you feel like someone has stepped on your toes. Especially when that person is supposed to be Christian. Remember those expectations?

So, when you hear yourself saying “they should have…” take a second and evaluate the expectation that you are projecting.

Just know that it’s o.k. to express your feelings and healthy boundaries really do free you up for a more enjoyable life.

Blessings!